Co-parenting isn’t always fun and games. There are times in which you and your co-parent might not see eye-to-eye. In these cases, you’ll have to work out respective solutions. This may be a challenge, but taking the time to think about what’s best for the children can sometimes help to make things a bit easier.

When there is an issue that arises, make sure that you speak directly to your ex about it. You don’t need to try to use the children as messengers because this can be devastating for them. Kids will sometimes think that they have to choose sides as they relay messages. There’s also a chance that the messages will be improperly relayed, which can lead to even more contention.

The discussions you have with your ex might turn tense. Make sure that you remain respectful even when this happens. There is never a good time to have a negative attitude with your ex. Mutual respect can set the foundation for a positive parenting relationship.

Your children and what they need must always remain at the heart of these discussions. Try to think about the current situation and how various solutions might impact the children. Don’t bring up the past or focus on what happened between you and your ex. Those points should never creep into child custody decisions.

Sometimes, the solution you need is covered in the parenting plan. Be sure to check this document regularly. If it isn’t addressed and you think that this will be an ongoing problem, you may consider seeking a modification of the order.